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Quietly does it

My eldest does everything quietly. No fuss, no nonsense, no fanfare. It must be hard for her being the quietest in a houseful of loudness but she doesn't complain. She gets on with her own thing and when she smiles it lights up the whole room. Of course she drives me mad, it's what children do and I drive her mad, it's what mothers do!

Being a first time mother I was determined to be a fabulous mother, what new mother doesn't? I was basically clueless and whilst I had looked after children having your own changes the game considerably. My own mother suggested that not everyone can breastfeed so "don't be surprised if you can't do it" was like a red rag to a bull and as I got to grips with breastfeeding it came easily when I knew what I was doing. My aunty's old nanny who had also looked after us came to visit one day and suggested that she found changing nappies on her knee to be the easiest way so I tried it and it worked. Sleeping through the night was an issue though and the Health Visitor in a kindly moment suggested that the solution was bigger than the problem.

We had nearly 2 and half years before I became a mother of 2 and she became a big sister. In that time we spent time together, doing everything together, we spent time with my grandfather who enjoyed being a great grandfather, we would take my granny out for day trips and I was balancing parenting an oldie and a new baby, I watched her crawl, walk, play, sleep (sometimes) and grow. I didn't realise that she had hearing issues and when the ENT consultant said that she had significant hearing loss and would need an operation I cried. She had 2 operations and had to learn to concentrate and listen. Conversations would go over her head and she would nod in agreement at anything, she would watch us as we spoke and would lip read. She then became a big big sister at the age of 6 and her hearing reached an acceptable level when she was 8.

Last night we watched some videos and it brought a tear to my eye. There on the screen was my happy go lucky little girl, whilst standing beside me chuckling at the antics was my not quite grown up firstborn. She might have got to 17 but she will always be my baby.

As I said quietly does it.


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